King Henry VIII Grammar School

Hello Dreamtime, It may be a wonder to you, but the reason for it is due to a King Henry VIII School secret pact which goes "Whatever you do, don't mention "Zulu"." Just thought it was high time to break that particular omerta. And Jack Hawkins was in both "Waterloo" and "Zulu". He was also in "Bridge Over The River Kwai", which was a film featuring an obsessive British Officer, who, ultimately, overlooked the bigger scheme of things. Which was also a theme of "The Charge Of The Light Brigade". As you might have guessed, I have been watching too many episodes of "Only Connect". The only reason we read "War And Peace" is to be able to announce "I have read "War And Peace"!" Truthfully, it starts to warm up after about page 750, but I wouldn't advise anyone to have a go at it, unless they are in need of something soporific. No, that is unfair. It is a very good and thought-provoking book. But I wouldn't advise anyone to have a go at it. Shakespeare. Shakespeare. Shakespeare. A prolific author, a man of many words and most of them incomprehensible to school pupils. To have studied and tried to answer questions about one of his plays is to engage in a rite of passage. On the other side awaits joy and gratitude for his art, or a level of psychological pain that is impossible to describe to the uninitiated.

Oh no! I had it on my Christmas list, too

Bags, you mentioned "The Charge of the Light Brigade" by Tennyson but Kipling's sequel "The Last of the Light Brigade" rarely gets a mention. The Last of the Light Brigade

You've jogged my memory there Bags. I too now remember the Friday Film Club, but I couldn't for the life of me have said which master was in charge of the event. Curiously, the only film I remember seeing was 'Charge of the Light Brigade!' I must admit Charge of the Light Brigade became far more interesting when read through the memoirs of Sir Harry Flashman as narrated by George MacDonald Fraser.

Thanks Pix, heart rending it may be but when you hear it spoken it goes deeper.

Link to the Winter 2016 edition of "The Old Coventrian", which includes an item about Droob (aka Ted Norrish) including a photo by Laurie Wrench

Reading the Coventrian, toasts to Her Majesty the Queen and The Fallen seem to sum up exactly the 50s that Henry VIII was still trying to live in while I was there a good decade and more later.

Brian Parkinson BA (Hons), former teacher at King Henry VIII School 1965-1970 and Finham Park Comprehensive School 1970-1994, passed away on 15th January 2017, aged 77 years.

Very sad. He taught us Latin in the fuzzers, and was one of the younger teachers who had a sense of humour, but would not tolerate messing about. His enthusiasm and positive attitude rubbed off, and made the lessons much more bearable. He was probably about 24 when he taught us, and I remember that his nose looked as if it had been broken - word had it he was a boxer. Sometimes for fun, he'd give us races by row, e.g. as soon as he entered the room he'd say "Row 1 and Row 4, perfect of amo, starting...NOW!", then announce the winning row. Unlike Droob, he did not use a stopwatch. I guess he was young enough not to have become disillusioned with life/the job/state of the world etc., as one or two of the older ones had. His initials being BP, his nickname was Bert. We didn't know his first name was Brian. The same applied to Foghorn, whose real name I have learnt from this forum was Brian, not Bert as he was known to us.

As it has gone relatively quiet in Henrys Forum, I thought I would give my creative juices a workout. Okay. Enough of that. Now, a philosophical question. What was the point of dividing us up into Houses? On starting at the school, we were told that we had to acquire a specific coloured tie and then attend a weekly gathering at which all boys wearing similarly coloured ties would be in attendance. I think I was expecting some sort of bonding exercise involving high fives and fist bumping but, from memory, we just gathered together for the purposes of dropping off to sleep whilst standing up, during the reading out of various inconsequential notices. Then we might, if we were unlucky, be called upon to represent the House at Sports, where the object was to lose as often as possible. (Or was that just my ambition?) Aside from that, I can't really comprehend what their function was. Maybe there were secret societies being operated - without my knowledge - where you would be properly initiated, by having to declare undying allegiance to your House and then be subjected to some sort of humiliating ritual. For example, having to sing the National Anthem whilst handfuls of sherbert fizz was crammed into your mouth. Or reciting Latin verbs at the same time as trying to balance an upright test tube on your forehead. That sort of thing. Or maybe they were just another total waste of time. Any more insightful explanations would be gratefully received.

Greetings, Oh Sage of Windsor. Do you know I haven`t a clue? And until you so profoundly raised the subject I haven`t evinced the slightest interest. But, having put my best mind to it, my first question would be "when was the practice first instituted in educational establishments?" For instance our rendering of the school anthem was: "We are the dump at the top of the hump That Henry the Chump did will" Was it all cut and dried in that natal day when Good King Hal willed it? Could he have said "Let there be mansions within this grammarian citadel of advancement?" (incidentally, I may be talking through my hat, as I fancy White, Hales, Sherwyn, etc weren`t actually concurrent with the old chap). I would guess it was just as in the church or in the army, it is for organisational purposes to sort out, divide and CONTROL sheep and goats and for new entrants, numbers had so swollen that it was necessary to identify cows, horses and fossils of any of these. I was "Whites" and having exhibited the characteristics of a cussed old goat all my life and now into my dotage, I am quite happy to believe that my correct destination was accurately assessed in 1947. I hate to raise the spectre of "incipient elitism", but educational authorities at the onset of brand new "Comprehensive establishments" had the opportunity to kick such outdated and socially divisive practices into touch. But was it just lazy thinking or actual perpetuation of elitism that when my father was released from his Secondary Modern sinecure and dragged to one of the first Comprehensives that he was designated House Master? I think I have clearly demonstrated that "Schools need houses; more than their pupils (sorry students) do" There should be further discussion of allocation of colours. White I can understand, but for the life of me where did Green, Purple and Yellow come from? I can perhaps see purple is something to do with the cloth, but did Henry have a bad dream one awful night that envisaged a Liberal organisation or even worse that a green and pleasant land should have to be defended by a green party?

That's about it, Inkers. My old school prospectus states that "the school is divided into houses, which compete with each other..." In all the years I was there, I couldn't see the point: house master, house assembly on Monday, different coloured ties (all his life, Jeff Vent seemed to be able to remember every boy's house, long after he'd forgotten their names!), competition... Our house master (Pop) once gave us a roasting because we were falling behind, and we weren't putting enough effort in to support our house, he said. I did my bit by entering the art and handicraft competition, and he did give me a glowing mention in my report that term. My feeling has always been that the house system in school was something that lingered on from centuries ago, and was long past its sell-by date. I could never understand the obsession with beating others, being number one, the winner, one-upmanship... certainly not on the sports field, or in a league table of academic achievements, like the Sir Thomas White's Scholarship board, where an annual superman had his name carved in wood for all time. There were always more important things in life.

Hollands and I still have no idea what it was all about.

I never saw much point in the house system either. If you went through the Junior School you were allocated your house at age 7 and it was with you for your entire school career. I was in Hales House and I seem to recall we were supposed to take pride in our house. In the Junior School it meant virtually nothing in reality, but became more competitive in the Senior School. I believe the house system is just part of the system of control that schools like KHVIII loved so much. Put boys in competition with each other to divide and rule, both in academic and sporting matters. I believe the antiquated house system still exists though. They apparently ditched Kings House so I guess 20% of the pupils had to realign their 'lifelong' allegiances.

Salutations Roger de Torksey, I enjoyed reading your musings. In addition, I was motivated to do a little research as a consequence. And according to a Wikipedia page on the subject, the primary purpose of Houses at Schools is to - get this - offer 'pastoral care' to students. Of course!! Why didn't I realise it straight away? "Feeling somewhat low and downbeat? Well, there are a wide range of care services available via your House that are specifically designed to lift you out of the dumps." Hmm. I must have mislaid the information pack when I started at the school. On the other hand, it might well have continued with "For example, we will show you how a cross-country run across fields that are ankle deep in mud and cow dung will do wonders for your spirits. Alternatively, why not try your hand at trying to grab the legs of another pupil and bring him crashing down on the rugby pitch? Bruised ribs and cuts to the face are well-known to make you forget your trifling concerns." I have yet to discover when the concept of Houses was first introduced in schools. It would have been interesting to know if there were reasons why we were assigned to particular Houses, as in the Harry Potter stories, where use was made of a magical Talking Hat. At Henrys, it would more likely have been a Talking Guff. And you don't want to mess with one of those creatures when they are riled. So, as you suggest, we could have been allocated according to particular traits. Such as - "Tie keeps lowering revealing top button on shirt", "Loud sneezer", "Permanently inky hands", "Annoyingly slams his desk top", "Can't resist trying to slide on freshly polished floor surfaces." And so on. It is interesting that you make reference to House colours. Hales House was the Green one and ought, therefore, to have been in prime position to offer 'pastoral care'. (Somewhere in that previous line there was a groan inducing joke trying to get out. Thankfully, I stopped it before it was too late. )